The Art of Loneliness

I stood a midst branches that needed to go on the metal green pole that would be transformed into a lovely Christmas tree, Christmas music from a holiday music station filled the room with lyrics I have heard since childhood. My mind drifted to times past. Somehow, I truly believed that by this time in my life, I would not be putting up the tree alone. This is a lonely time for anyone.

As I continued my journey into the memories of time past, I thought about the Christmas that changed the way I view life and the art of loneliness. That Christmas my emotions wanted to give in to pity parties and feelings of depression, I had to make a choice, it was up to me how I would stop allowing circumstances and scenarios to dictate these times and to teach my children to embrace all the good things that we celebrate during holidays and in life.

Looking around at the branches that old overwhelming sense of loneliness embraced me pulling at those emotions. Putting up the Christmas tree alone is probably one of the loneness acts a person can do. I had even toyed about just not doing it at all. I finally managed to get the last branch in place and all the lights on. Even though I did not have babbles and beads on it yet, the main task had been completed.
Later that evening a friend and her daughter arrived to have a little girly girl time. Even without the first babble, this face of this precious little girl lit up. I watched as she gently ran her hand over the branches, and smiled and giggled in delight. Smiling I knew that this is why I do Christmas trees. Why I decorate where ever I am. For it is not about my loneliness or even my emotions, it is about bringing the warmth and joy to others.

It was that lonely Christmas so many years ago, that I made the choice to make the holiday season a gift to others, brings a smile in the face of a child, to embrace those that are in my life with love and care. What has happened over all these years is that it spilled into just everyday life, not just during the holidays.
The Art of Loneliness- knowing how to control it not allowing it to control you.